danistrulytheman

I'm STILL a self confessing, self professing know-it-all, or so I think!


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Doctor’s visit!!

I wanted to book a last minute appointment today, and luckily they had an opening. I don’t want to get into details of why I went, but I wanted to get it diagnosed by a professional. And I was somewhat expecting the possibility of a x-ray. Not only did I go for x-rays, I got a prescription, and was to get blood work done at the lab as well, something that I opted to forego due to lacking time and also due to lacking a spine. No time, no spine (nice rhyme eh?)., Actually I went for three x-rays, oh and as a side note … the radiologist, with my form in hand, detailing my personal information asked me for my date of birth … can you fucking believe it? It happened again. I’m starting to think that it’s not necessarily that I don’t look my age, but perhaps that I don’t act my age … lol!! Ok, getting back to the Doctor and my visit. After this (his diagnosis and rehabilitation advice) was concluded and settled, and just as I was preparing to leave, I inquired about the H1N1 wanting to get his thoughts. I know that when the clinics first started offering the flu shot, it became a motherfucking zoo!! Long lines, people were panicking … this too he confirmed from what he saw during all the mayhem … even he couldn’t believe how wild it was!! Not only did he convince me it was in my best interest to get it, he also convinced me to get the seasonal flu shot as well!! So on the advice of my good Doctor, I got the double whammy … the motherfucking duece!! A matching pair … a shot in the arm (both arms in fact) . As of today danistrulytheman is motherfucking immunized for 1 whole year!! Sweet!!


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25 year old microwave oven!! Are you kidding me?

Today my microwave quit. Just fucking died. It was a GE Profile Spacesaver model, and after I removed it (no small feat considering it was built like a motherfucking tank … and weighed like one too) hanging from under my kitchen cabinets, I saw the back sticker on the unit indicated it was manufactured in October 1984 … in Japan no less. Can you fucking believe that? It’s over 25 years old!! Nothing nowadays lasts that long!! It survived all that time, serving me well. So today, out of necessity, and perhaps out of urgency too, I went shopping for a new microwave oven. I really had my heart set on a GE, since this one outperformed its intended lifespan, or any expectations that I might have had … plus my fridge and stove are both GE profile models. Unfortunately, what I saw in terms of build quality wasn’t what I expected, or wanted, so I had to settle for a Panasonic model. But, after a few test runs, I must say it appears to be very, very good. I’m looking forward to many, many¬† years of usage with the improved performance. My question is … will it be as good as the original? My answer is … not a fucking chance!!


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tiff at Tiffany & Co.

OK, so it wasn’t an argument, or even a disagreement. Just pent-up frustration after a long, long, day Christmas shopping at the mall. There was a huge lineup just to get in, even the local nightly news channels had coverage of it on their broadcasts … and I even knew what I wanted. I already had the item picked out from their website. It was something for myself. It was gonna be a slam-dunk, no-brainer for the salesperson … all she’d have to do is ring it up, and blue box and white ribbon the motherfucker!! Sadly, when we were let in (20-30 minutes later) I find out they are ‘out of stock’ on this particular item. Goddamn, I hating hearing that fucking phrase (out of stock). I just wanted to curl up into a fucking ball and cry!! Merry Fucking Christmas danistrulytheman!!


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Christmas … we’re almost there!!

Today I went to TheBeerStore for the last time this year. Actually to return my empties and clear out my house. I told my 2 buddies who work there, they’re both good shits … “I don’t want to see your ugly mugs till next year!!” I also told them I’m done with all of my LCBO shopping too. So fucking happy about that, what a relief. I’ve got beer and wine up the wazoo to last me well into the new year!! Now, tomorrow is gonna be another story!! I’m kinda committed to going Christmas shopping at Yorkdale. Suffice it to say, it’s going to be a Goddamn motherfucking zoo!! I actually drove by on the 401 today at 1:30 p.m. and couldn’t see any parking spots!! So multiply that craziness by a gazillion for the last Saturday shopping day left, and you get the idea of what I’m in for. I’ll endure, I’ll persevere, I’ll get through it … er, I hope!!


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Olympic Torch!!

The famous flame is coming to Toronto tonight. Seven o’clock at Nathan Phillips Square is the time and place for what should be an exciting ceremony. Later, a bunch of us are going for dinner and drinks and then heading over for what should be a fun night. People are really getting emotional and being patriotic about the whole thing. It’s all people have been talking about today. Having the Olympics in Vancouver is great for Canada, and is a great opportunity to show the world too just how awesome we are!!


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Christmas Crunch!!

Every year around this time, I swear I get so stressed dealing with all of the responsibilities that come with this Goddamn holiday. It seems like every minute details falls on my lap. What’s that saying? “if you want something done right, do it yourself”. That about sums it up for me … seems like I can’t rely on anyfuckingbody to help and pick up a bit of the slack. OK, enough crybabying!! Hey, when it’s finally all done, I can put my dogs up and relax!!


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dan+chrissy

OMG!! I haven’t looked at these in so, so long!! I must say though that as I am, I’m ear-to-ear Cheshire Cat grinning, even LMFAO!! I’m so profoundly proverbially proud as a motherfucking peacock for this, for what I did, for what it all was, for what I accomplished!! These will be with me forever, and I fucking love that!! Goddamn, the model-chickie is really cute … and the model-dude ain’t half bad either!! Hahahahaha!!


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shawarma

Driving throughout the city lately, I can’t believe how many new shawarma restaurants I see that are recently opened!! It’s as if they all (meaning these new shawarma restaurant owners) had a secret meeting with their plans to inundate us with these fantastic, delicious middle-eastern fast food joints. Hey, I’m not complaining, because personally I love shawarmas …¬† or donairs, whatever your preference is. I’m just amazed at their simultaneous influx into the community!! Speaking of the community, and shawarma … this is what makes Toronto so fucking great … our acceptance of diverse people and their cultures!!


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“never engage in a battle of wits with a moron” – danistrulytheman

It’s a no-win situation. It’s an impossible can’t-win situation. It’s a fucking futile fight. You’ll end up wasting your time. As well, you’ll be left with an abundant amount of frustration … hair pulling fucking frustration!! Retardedness vs. Intelligence is a Goddamn no-brainer here!! Fuck, it’s so lop-sided there should be a mercy rule equivalent!! I challenge anyone …you take Einstein, Hawking, and Edison combined … and I’ll take the motherfucking retard … we’ll see who wins!!


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hands of motherfucking stone!!

Roberto Duran was my favourite boxer when I was a kid growing up. He was arguably one of the greatest ever, of all time. He always controlled the ring, dictating the fight. He was relentless in his punishing pursuit. He was a true warrior, a true macho man, and he continually came hard at you, throwing those motherfucking haymakers!! Man, could he fucking hit!! For me this was boxing’s heyday, days that we’ll never see again, but it sure is great to relive them and remember how awesome they were. Roberto … te respeto mucho!!


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tuque

A blast of wicked winter weather had me wearing my tuque for the first time this year as I was snow-shoveling peacefully early in the morning with nary a soul in sight. I love shoveling snow(apparently, at times love shoveling shit too …lol), it’s very relaxing, and gives me a chance to think about things. Which gets me back to tuque, and how uniquely Canadian the word is. It is the only word to use… correctly that is for its intended definition. Can you believe those fucking retarded, dumb-ass Americans call it a stocking cap? Now why the fuck would I want to wear a sock on my head? Makes no fucking sense!! Sounds so disgustingly filthy too!! I mean socks are for feet, and come in pairs, not as a single sock. So strange, so weird … eh?


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say it ain’t so danistrulytheman

WTF? Is this a kinder, gentler, version of me? I’ve noticed that while I’ve being using my favourite “motherfucker” a lot, that I haven’t being using my also favourite “retard” or “douche-bag” at all!! What’s up with that? OMG, the world just ain’t right if I don’t throw in a fucking retard, or douche-bag into my blog every so often!! I promise to remedy this motherfucking pronto!!