… for the time being at least. Feel such a sense of harmonious equilibrium …  a wonderful, peaceful feeling!! Feels good y’all!!

Man, I’m having tons o’ fun going through old boxes and digging up all this shit!!

I decided to publish the content, I mean it was on a postcard, and it was innocent and innocuous. Fuck, if nothing else, it’s very, very sweet … I remember reading it way back then and having warm, loving, anoosh thoughts … and reading it now still makes me smile, and still makes me feel good!! You want to read it? Well, that’s your prerogative motherfuckers … just crank your necks!!

P.S. I had the best motherfucking time in Yosemite!! What a breathtakingly, beautiful place!! This proverbially is truly God’s Country!!

over thinking, over analyzing separate the body from the mind.
withering my intuition leaving opportunities behind.
feed my will to feel this moment, urging me to cross the line.
reaching out to embrace the random.
reaching out to embrace whatever may come.

drawn outside the lines of reason

reaching out to embrace the random.
reaching out to embrace whatever may come.

Just too much of that shit going around … no need to add to the motherfucking pile … I’m much bigger and better than that!!

All these words they make no sense, I found bliss in ignorance

Less I hear the less you say, you’ll find that out anyway, just like before

I find the answers aren’t so clear, wish I could find a way to disappear

Shut up when I\’m talking to you. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!

‘Cause I’m one step closer to the edge and I’m about to break

Anybody else remember these two fucks … er, these characters? Looking up information on Wikipedia is great. I never realized that Mr. Dressup debuted in 1967 on the CBC. I must have started watching the show from its fucking inception … it sure takes me back, growing up, having great fun watching this!!

All my life I’ve been searching for something
Something never comes never leads to nothing
Nothing satisfies but I’m getting close
Closer to the prize at the end of the rope

All night long I dream of the day
When it comes around and it’s taken away
Leaves me with the feeling that I fear the most
Feel it come to life when I see your ghost

And I\’m done done on to the next one

Will I find the believer
Another one who believes
Another one to deceive
Over and over down on my knees

If I get any closer
And if you open up wide
And if you let me inside
On and on I’ve got nothing to hide

Done done and I’m on to the next one
Done done and I’m on to the next one
Done done and I’m on to the next one

Ordinarily as my pile of turkey leftovers quickly starts diminishing, I add it to cream of mushroom soup, frozen peas, sautéed onion, and cremini mushrooms. Then, I mix it with cooked broad egg noodles, casserole dish the whole shebang, and top it off with a combo of panko breadcrumbs and shredded cheese, and finally with butter dollops before baking. However, this time I was having turkey sandwiches cold-cut style … on rye with mayo, mustard, lettuce, tomato, bacon, and Swiss cheese!! Hence, I was using the turkey much quicker than expected and felt I didn’t have enough for the casserole!! No Biggie!! I baked french fries, made my turkey gravy that I enhanced with bacon lardons and crispy, over caramelized onions. I reheated my turkey, and added it on top of my fires, with crumbled Danish Blue … that’s the motherfucking key … blue cheese and bacon? Are you kidding me? So fucking good!! Finally I doused it all with my lovely gravy!! Oh, and as a side note, I placed my serving plate into the oven, filled with residual heat from the french fries allowing me ample time before sitting down for dinner to wash some dishes and clean my kitchen … I love keeping my kitchen clean btfw … and also allowing the poutine to heat up extra hot internally before serving … just the way it should be!!

Waking up, showering, going through my early morning, daily routine, just getting ready to head out, I realized it was mid-January, and from that realization, for some strange reason, it made me think of Maria, my friend … that’s how my fucking brain works, I can’t even explain it, or understand it, or even begin to comprehend it … weird things just trigger these thoughts … capeche? It’s her birthday I started thinking, and then I really was wracking my brain trying to figure out the exact day, and how old she is … keep in mind I see her infrequently, I think last time was about a year and a half ago. So, I drove by her place, her business, and approached her and hugged her and wished her a happy birthday … telling her what day and year I thought she was born. Well, I guessed right on both counts. She couldn’t fucking believe it, nor could I for that matter, but hey I am pretty fucking awesome … at times … hahaha!! She was genuinely so surprised and thrilled to see me, and I was so happy to see her too. I asked how she was, and what special stuff she did on her birthday, which was yesterday. She speaks briefly about her birthday, but I see she’s distracted, so I ask her if she’s ok, and she’s reluctant to say much, but I persist and she tells me that she visited her Doctor and has bad news. On her birthday, of all days she had a Pap test, and now next week she has to go for a biopsy. OMFG I thought, these things always end up bad!! I grabbed her, holding her, and she starts divulging more information, telling me more details and in the meantime crying uncontrollably into my shoulder … concerned about everything, her family, and especially her kids!! At that point it was all I could do to keep myself from crying too!! I told her I’d be praying for her, something I never fucking do, but I will … for her … and in a couple of weeks I’ll go see her again, and hopefully the Good Lord will do what needs to be done to undo this awful situation and hopefully the good Doctor gives her good news too!! I really, really, really hope so!!!!

can\’t get the stink off

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts is
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself, yourself, yourself.

That’s how old I am here. Taken in La Jolla. My first time to set foot in California. And don’t be fooled by the picture, this was in the dead of winter, either very late December, or early January. I can’t remember. Nobody else was wearing shorts, just us two, my buddy and I. The natives? Hell, they were all bundled up. Hey, 60º is downright balmy for a dumb-fuck-Canuck!! We last minute decided to take a road trip, so we packed our shit, tossed it into my Gran Torino and drove that bitch all the way into Mexico(Ensenada).We detoured through Provo, Utah on the way down … my friend was Mormon and had friends going to university and was eager to visit them. What the fuck did I care? Part of the rules of road-tripping … no motherfucking rules!! No schedules, no worries … just go with the flow attitude. And I was lucky enough to buy this awesome Jim McMahon Cougars jersey that I’m seen sporting here because of it!! We lasted a full couple of weeks in total!! It was the times of our lives!!It was a motherfucking blast!!

time keeps rolling by

it’s a bit early in the midnight hour for me
to go through all the things that I want to be
I don’t believe in everything I see
you know I’m blind so why’d you disagree
take me away ’cause I just don’t want to stay
and the lies you make me say
are getting deeper every day

what you gonna do when the walls come falling down?
you never move you never make a sound
where you gonna swim with the riches that you found?
you’re lost at sea well I hope that you’ve drowned

all around the world, you’ve got to spread the word
tell them what you heard
we’re gonna make a better day
all around the world, you’ve got to spread the word
tell them what you heard
you know it’s gonna be ok

… just saying!!

Found a couple more pics in a different photo album. The other one, the second pic, was August 1985. Oh, I cropped myself out cuz I was leaning sideways, kinda awkward looking, I didn’t like it. But, that’s me with my tight ass motherfucking fitting Jordache jeans … and my Stan Smiths, God I loved those. And that’s me with my motherfucking hand, grabbing her ass tightly … God I loved that too!!

Love that sexy anklet too!!

It isn’t gonna prove a thing to me

Good intentions pave the way to hell

I hear the questions surface in my mind
Of my mistakes that I have made
Times and places I have left behind
And am I ever going to make the grade

As I beat my head against the wall
Running round in circles in vain
I’m feeling three feet tall
You don’t understand I’m fading away

somebody holds the key

but I\’m near the end and I just ain\’t got the time

and I’m wasted and I can’t find my way home

Almost exactly … it was July 1986. And … completely not exactly … it was only 1/10 of the world away, at most … California. This was during the time that I lived there, about a year in total, I guess. I’m here with my girlfriend …  God she’s gorgeous, as you can see.  I wish I didn’t have to block out her face, but thought it was wise to do so. She was beautiful, and smokin’ hot … she was my anoosh!!

Jsesus Christ!! I just realized that I have two birds in my freezer!! I bought the first one, it went on sale really cheap just before Thanksgiving, but I already had my Thanksgiving turkey so this became an extra one that I didn’t need, but I couldn’t resist the price. And then a month or so later, Butterball® went on sale in so many supermarkets … different variations too!! Frozen, fresh, stuffed, without stuffing … I guess pretty much all their shit, they were running the full fucking gamut!! So, I bought the frozen one, but get this … you don’t have to thaw it before cooking!! It’s plain as day on the wrapping, to make sure you don’t fuck it up!! How’s this even possible? Cooking a turkey from a completely frozen state? I still don’t even really believe it and I can’t wait to try it, but this week-end I’ll be having my locally raised grain fed turkey. I even have so much stuff for the side dishes. Get it? Stuff? That’s right y’all I have the stuffing … plus the peaches and cream corn, plus the potatoes, plus the cranberry sauce. I’m pretty much good to go … just need those heat n’ serve dinner rolls and carrots(small ones, with their stalks)!! My favourite is the potatoes and carrots that I toss into the ingenuously flavoured and seasoned turkey basting fat and melted butter juices!! They get all roasted, sticky and caramelized … how fucking good does that sound?!!

Not even remotely fucking close!! Life’s a bitch, ain’t it?

Sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laugh and sing for the tear
Sing with me if it’s just for today

everbody\’s got their dues in life to pay

You got to lose to know how to win