danistrulytheman

I'm STILL a self confessing, self professing know-it-all, or so I think!


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you have no idea who you’re dealing with!

been one of those days folks. then, to top it off – coming home all excited to see my UPS delivered package from Banana Republic waiting at my door … well, been one of those days continued. first off, the $110 item that I purchased looks more like it cost $10. here’s your gift, please go online to see how much I spent, lol! but, what really pissed me off was that gift message beautifully printed on a postcard from gift services that was supposed to be included, wasn’t! whatthemotherfuck? I worked long and hard getting my wording perfect in 70 characters or less, lol! quick call to loopy lucy or whatever the fuck her name was voicing my frustration. no problem, tells me she’s gonna to do right by me by offering some cockamamie discount for my next purchase with Banana Republic (honestly didn’t hear/care to hear the details). cindy lou who, or whatever the hell your name is, I interrupt, “there won’t be any future purchases, so how in the hell does this help me?” attempting to fix my problem by asking me to buy more crap isn’t a solution! I wasn’t born yesterday. I did not fall off any turnip truck. now, lucy liu, quickly seeing the big banana from my point of view, understanding who she’s dealing with, suddenly sherlocks me into a further 10% discount to be credited back to my AMEX before my head explodes! thanks, lois lane!!


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while I do appear to fly by the seat of my pants

… it ain’t the case. just that my mind works a million miles per second spewing pertinent permutations giving the appearance/illusion everything’s being made up as I go. trust me … is def a rhyme to dansreason, lol!!


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two shakes of a lamb’s tail

… heard this the other day. I swear it’s been 20 years+ since last hearing it. tell ya, made me smile/laugh when I did (made her repeat it, playing dumb as not hearing her say it the 1st time, lol) … words/phrases can be so finicky falling victim to leaving our vocabulary for various changing times/new generation reasons. occasionally, eventually becoming obsolete at times. weird, and cool at the same time!

… be back in two shakes of a lamb’s tail y’all … lol!!


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Poutine? Dude, thought ya said poontang!

Honestly, ain’t joking! And for a second, took me smilingly back to my youth mishearing you! I agree, would be great to grab some poutine, or some poontang … or both, lol!

… legalized brothels should add this to list of services offered, catering to horny ‘n hungry Canadians, lol!!