I'm STILL a self confessing, self professing know-it-all, or so I think!

My sweet Lady Jane!!

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I just got off the phone with a customer service rep from my cell phone carrier. Oh, before I go any further, please excuse my digression, I need to vent (thanks, lol) … I’ve been reading a lot of shit from bloated praire heifers exalting such wonderful CS incidents they’ve been experiencing lately, slapping themselves on their fat backs (Look at me everybody, I praised one of the minion subordinates) … meanwhile these are the same two-faced fucks to publicly bash same CS reps when they need a human punching-bag to make themselves feel better and superior. You skanky cows, you can’t have it both ways!! You are a miserable mooing motherfucking ungrateful herd 95% of the time, then when your meds take effect, temporarily calming the storm, are such sweet angels the remaining measly 5%?? If you treated people with respect and kindness 100% of the time, you wouldn’t have any problems!! While chewing your cud, chew on this … in the succinct, yet blatantly eyeopening wisdom of one of your recently departed cohorts … and I quote, “GO FUCK YOURSELVES”!! Whew, that felt good, lol!! Ok, back to my call with the CS rep (Jane). I ALWAYS ask ANYONE I phone how they are, how they’re doing (first thing I do when calling CS reps is ask for their name … it’s just common courtesy), no matter if they are my friend, or a stranger, if I’m in a great mood, or in not such a good mood, or if heaven forbid even in a shitty mood … I don’t even begin to get into the details of my phone call till later, I treat people same as I’d like to be treated. Jane tells me she has a headache, but doing OK. I wish her Happy Valentine’s Day, adding it’s not much, but hope it helps… she laughs. I ask, “you in Toronto?” She tell me no, the Philippines, I’m not surprised, not in the least, I know everybody … these companies, these corporations outsource their call centres. I can hear American drawls a million miles away no matter how slight they may appear … her accent though gave nothing away. My given name is Daniel, but she asks me if she can call me Dan … I fucking laugh and say “of course” (everybody calls me that btw, very, very few people call me Daniel). She kept asking me questions verifying my account … then she asked for my birthdate. I said knowlingly, “you don’t fucking have that” She laughed, and confirmed she didn’t. BUSTED!! She made the necessary changes to my account that I requested, and we were done … but we wouldn’t get off the phone … both of us didn’t want to end the call. I asked her what time it was there (13 hours ahead of Toronto). I tell her she’s well on her Tuesday, I’m still working on my Monday. It was kinda flirtatious, we kept wishing Happy Valentine’s Day back and forth to each other … It was almost like … no you hang up, no you hang up, no you first, no you  … lol!! Finally we did, I felt all warm and fuzzy afterwards, get your minds outta the Goddamn gutter … JESUS CHRIST, it wasn’t as if I was gonna drop my drawers and start diddling myself right then and there … I mean, people were milling about and could see me, lol!!

Thanks Jane for injecting some fun into my day, hope I did the same for you!!

… yeah, yeah, yeah … Happy Valentine’s Day to the rest of you too … equally to all the dudes and bitches, lol!!

Author: danistrulytheman

I'm still a self confessing, self professing know-it-all, or so I think!

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