danistrulytheman

I'm STILL a self confessing, self professing know-it-all, or so I think!


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Maria – my friend!!

Waking up, showering, going through my early morning, daily routine, just getting ready to head out, I realized it was mid-January, and from that realization, for some strange reason, it made me think of Maria, my friend … that’s how my fucking brain works, I can’t even explain it, or understand it, or even begin to comprehend it … weird things just trigger these thoughts … capeche? It’s her birthday I started thinking, and then I really was wracking my brain trying to figure out the exact day, and how old she is … keep in mind I see her infrequently, I think last time was about a year and a half ago. So, I drove by her place, her business, and approached her and hugged her and wished her a happy birthday … telling her what day and year I thought she was born. Well, I guessed right on both counts. She couldn’t fucking believe it, nor could I for that matter, but hey I am pretty fucking awesome … at times … hahaha!! She was genuinely so surprised and thrilled to see me, and I was so happy to see her too. I asked how she was, and what special stuff she did on her birthday, which was yesterday. She speaks briefly about her birthday, but I see she’s distracted, so I ask her if she’s ok, and she’s reluctant to say much, but I persist and she tells me that she visited her Doctor and has bad news. On her birthday, of all days she had a Pap test, and now next week she has to go for a biopsy. OMFG I thought, these things always end up bad!! I grabbed her, holding her, and she starts divulging more information, telling me more details and in the meantime crying uncontrollably into my shoulder … concerned about everything, her family, and especially her kids!! At that point it was all I could do to keep myself from crying too!! I told her I’d be praying for her, something I never fucking do, but I will … for her … and in a couple of weeks I’ll go see her again, and hopefully the Good Lord will do what needs to be done to undo this awful situation and hopefully the good Doctor gives her good news too!! I really, really, really hope so!!!!


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one day I’ll get to you and teach you how to get to purest hell

can\’t get the stink off

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself

you do it to yourself, you do
and that’s what really hurts is
you do it to yourself, just you
you and no one else
you do it to yourself
you do it to yourself, yourself, yourself.